Which have you been labeled — introvert or extrovert? Are you truly shy and reticent OR outgoing and overtly expressive, at ALL times?

I am fascinated by the word or. We commonly think of it as a limited choice between two things… hot or cold; inside or outside; today or tomorrow; boy or girl; happy or sad. We must choose one or the other. We can’t have both. Nope. Not possible. Choose one.

The definition of or is to link alternatives. The definition of alternatives is one of two or more available possibilities with a synonym of option. This is starting to feel better. One, two or more possibilities or options.

So instead of introvert or extrovert, I can look for more possibilities, options. We are taught at a very young age that our choices are limited. We are either this or that. A toddler will spend hours immersed in something because they are exploring the endless possibilities. Adults come along and narrow those options because we don’t have time to_______ (insert a bazillion things here), but we simply don’t have time. We are busy, responsible people and we have to make quick choices and the more limited those choices are the quicker we can move on. Time is a wastin’.

Oops, back to introvert or extrovert, or wait, I started with nouns or verbs. Were the labels given (introvert or extrovert) supposed to be nouns or verbs? Am I an introvert or extrovert or do I introvert or extrovert? If I am one or the other, I feel very limited. Shy or outgoing. I think it is impossible to be one or the other and live a full life. If I am a shy person all the time, I would have no interactions with other people, since I would be too shy to let them in. If I am an outgoing person all the time, people would not be able to interact with me, since I would be the one talking all the time. This leads us straight into being stuck, because growth requires us to have relationships with other people.

But what if they are supposed to be verbs? I caught myself introverting last week when I didn’t speak my opinion at that meeting, or I think I might be extroverting too much as no one said anything in response to the detailed story I was telling everyone at that party. Hmmm…

Life is not about limiting ourselves, it is about expanding ourselves. If we don’t take the time to explore the many possible options, how will we ever expand? Consider being more childlike and take some time to explore the possibilities that are available to you in every situation, every day. An added bonus is that there are infinite possibilities, which means you don’t have to share your option or expect someone else to share theirs. You get to have your very own. No more this or that, right or wrong, good or bad…. I think I will go introvert on this for awhile and then go extrovert it to the world!

Take time to explore and redefine your beliefs and understandings and you will find yourself expanding to possibility after possibility. It can be as simple as an expanded definition of a word to as grand as the opening up of your mind and heart to an infinite world of love. The possibilities are endless. Stop looking to identify yourself as a noun and start being a verb.